"THAT'S ME IN THE BEST-BUY, LOO-ZIN' MY RELIGION --"

So, I am having to buy a new lap-top. A couple of my friends are encouraging me to, well, go MAC. It struck me immediately as a shocking suggestion. So, well, menacingly mad cap....or even treacherous. Like dating a Yankee fan. I've always been so absolutely PC....ask anyone who knows me. [coy cough]

Anyway, I keep trying to have conversations with people who can only be referred to as the Stepford MAC's, but no one can give me any good, clear reasons for switching my electronic allegiance. Here's how the investigation usually unfolds...

ME: So, tell me why I should become a MAC user.

STEPFORD MAC: Oh yeah! You really should.

ME: Because......?

STEPFORD MAC: Because it's soooooooooooooooooooooooooo much better. It's amazing.

ME: Really? How better?

STEPFORD MAC: (eyes glazing over) I remember when I switched. Man, I'll never go back.

ME: Because......?

STEPFORD MAC: Yeah.... What?

ME: Why is it better? What makes the MAC so great?

STEPFORD MAC: (burst of laughter; then, with emphasis) EV-REE-THING. No comparison.

ME: In what way?

STEPFORD MAC: (losing patience with my clueless idiocy) It can do everything.

ME: Like WHAT?! I don't need it to chew and spit!

STEPFORD MAC: Well, it like, never crashes.

ME: (hopeful; we're getting somewhere) So that's good, right. Although, my PC never really crashes... What else?

STEPFORD MAC: (eyes out of focus again) So much better. Every way.


Please, feel free to give me some help.

That's me in the corner.